Crisis on Infinite Parodyverses Part #6 This Is How The World Goes Away

Post By ag Wed Jun 21, 2006 at 12:31:21 pm EDT	Subject Crisis on Infinite Parodyverses Part #6 This Is How The World Goes Away Originally All Right. Time to get serious about the PV. Crisis on Infinite Parodyverses Repost Thread	In Reply To ag Wed Jun 21, 2006 at 11:42:25 am EDT

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The earthquake had rattled buildings all across GothemMetropolis York this evening. Jackie Rabbit had just finished getting the two families she was helping to a safe location when she saw the girl.
The little one looked eight years old with long curly red hair and a dark crimson cloak. She was standing on a roof of a shaking building but she didn’t look scared at all.
Jackie used her rabbit powers to hop up and grab the little girl. “Don’t be afraid little one! I’ve got you!”
The girl simply held on as Jackie landed safely on the pavement.
The JBH member then knelt down to speak with the child, “Are you alright? What’s your name?”
The child’s eyes were very old. She simply looked into Jackie Robert’s soul and replied, “My name is Annabelle. I’ve been waiting to meet you Jackie Roberts.”
Taken back at the adult feeling the child gave off Jackie tried to act naturally, “Have you now? Where are your parents Annabelle?”
“They died years ago. Listen to me Jackie. I’ve been watching you for years. You need to be true to what you are. So far you’ve been lucky. The substitute life you’ve led since Dracu’s gambit has been sufficient for you. Soon that will not be the case. Soon mortal you will discover what you truly are. There never was any going back. Very soon we will see each other again and you will at that time fully understand.”
“What? I don’t understand. What do you mean?”
When Annabelle spoke next Jackie could see her two sharp teeth, “See you soon.”
As the little vampire vanished into her mist form Jackie just knelt there slack jawed.

The city of Goth Haven sits under the same strange night as Storm Giants from Ausgard smash their way through anything that gets in their way.
Right now Ben Hermes, Ben’s friend Brooke Lynn Bridge and his neighbor Laura has gotten in their way.
Ben wonders what he could possibly do as a gigantic war mace comes swiftly down to squash them.
He doesn’t have to wonder for long though as someone in red, white and blue stands in front and blocks the massive weapon.
“Not tonight!” Mister Epitome says to the giant as Hatman with his Super Sonics hat on flies the women out of harms way. dull thud then tackles Ben to the ground.
“Hey! What did you do that for?” Ben complained.
“Just thought you’d want saving is all.” Thud replied as he shuffled off.
Ben could hear his lady friends exclaim to Hatman as the hero rocketed towards a giant, “Now THERE’S a real hero!”

There were twenty Storm Giants rampaging through the main business district of Goth Haven. Seven Lair Legionaries were on the scene trying to rescue civilians and subdue the out of place mythical creatures.
Dancer was helping Assistant Mayor J. Thomas Macklinberg to a safe area. Visionary was next to her helping J. J. Sebastian, Owner of Goth Haven Times. The Falcon was flying Kid Produce’s cousin Elisabeth “Betty” Stevens and Gulp N' Go clerk Armanja to safety. Hatman had made another pass and scoped up the butler named Manchester from certain doom.
Mister Epitome had started hitting a Storm Giant while the Manga Shoggoth enveloped another.

At the offices of the Goth Haven Times the Editor, Edgar St. Croi, was shouting, "All right, you's guys!"
Maria Lane coughed.
"All right, you's guys and gal. There are big freaking giants rampaging outside and you's reporters just watch out the window? Get out there, we need to get the story before anyone else!"
"But we'll get stepped on!" reporter Maria answered.
"You'll be fine! Now, Get out there!" St. Croi shot back.
"Edgar, don't ever change." Reporter Benjy "Mad Dog" Curich chuckled.
"Look!" Edgar St. Croi pointed, "Nancy Olsen, the host of that news program is out there right now getting our story! Now, Get!"
The Reporters got there stuff & left.
Outside Nancy was in Visionary’s arms as the fake man helped her out of harms way.
“Excuse me Mr. Visionary is it true you’re in trouble for the shotty job Visionary Vehicles has done with their cars?”
“Those aren’t mine!” Vish said defensively.
“So you wont be attending court for ripping off the public?”
“No I wont, wait! I didn’t… I mean I.. aw crap.”

The giants continue their march as Falcon takes one out with his surface to air missiles. Hatman in his Steelers cap and Mister Epitome team up to take out another.
“Four down and sixteen to go!” Dancer commented as she danced the mambo, causing the probabilities of a Storm Giant’s war mace slipping from his grasp to knock another out to go from 1,086,423 to 1 to even out. The chances that the unconscious giant would fall on an unpopulated section of street works out as well.
“~Where is this city’s heroes?~” Cressida, the telepathic tape worm in dull thud’s lower intestine asked as she turned the fur in a giant’s one piece fur covering to spurs, causing the mythical beast pain.
The Falcon put him out of his agony. “Maybe the Wonderful Seven is arguing about whether they should get involved? This isn’t a paying gig after all.”
“Can we help it if we like to get paid?” Inter-Planet Janet asked as the Wonderful Seven charged into the fray.

[Crisis Pin-Up Poster #5: The Wonderful Seven
On the balcony of the Wonderful Seven Inc. building, under the lighting flashes through the night sky, they pose.
Jet Starscream, the leader, hovers above the group, menacingly. Inter-Planet Janet hovers on his left by means of her rocket pack, she looks at him lovingly. The Golden Guardian is flying over to the group using his armor's thrusters. Nite-Owl stands in the partial shadows. Artimis stands triumphantly. Speed Freak vibrates out of sync with the rest of the group, he stands below Jet and
Janet. The Hunter stands near Artimis, eying her "muscles". Benton Kraft and Sara Jones are also present.]

“What took you guys so long?” Falcon asked while he and Golden Guardian both blasted a giant.
“We were having a meeting.” Dr. Jack Austen, the Golden Guardian replied.
“Don’t tell me you were deciding whether to help or not?” Dancer asked Inter-Planet Janet as the Probability Dancer was helping Sara Jones, the Wonderful Seven’s secretary to safety.
“That's private information, Missy and not really any of the Lair Legion's business.” Janet answered as she helped Roger the Gulp N' Go clerk to his feet.
“Well you don’t have to be rude.” dull thud said to the Hunter while the latter was catching falling civilians in his net.
“Look, we’re not trying to be rude but you don’t need to assume we don’t care. This is our town after all.” Artimis explained to Visionary as she stabbed a giant in the leg with her sword.
“I think my team mates understand that. The important thing is we beat these giants!” Hatman said as he grew to giant size after putting on his Tennessee Titans hat on. Hatman then knocked the other giant down to Nite-Owl. The dark Detective drove a gas truck into the felled giant’s head, jumping out of the vehicle just at the right time.
Speed Freak had trapped another giant in a tornado as he sped around it. The giant lost it’s balance enough to fall into the Manga Shoggoth. “Interesting components.” was the elder creature’s only comment. Shawn Reinolds (the hero called Speed Freak) felt like he was going to be sick.
“By the way Jet Starscream, after this is all over the Office of Paranormal Security would like to meet with your team. It seems some of your actions are of a questionable nature.” Mister Epitome said as he knocked the second to last giant into the river.
“Aw, go screw yourself!” John Vegas aka John Hermes aka Jet Starscream asked as he blasted the last giant to the ground.
“Pay up!” Flapjack the LL’s butler and servant said to Benton, the WS's Butler.
“Very well but I still do not understand why you bet against your own team taking the last one.” Benton said while digging into his wallet.
“I live with them.”
Dancer was helping a shaken Randy another Gulp 'N Go employee, step out of the rubble that was the Gulp N' Go when her old boyfriend Con Jonstantine called to her.
“Hey luv! Come here!”
“Alright but just for a moment. Will you be alright?”
Randy nodded his head. He had secret crush on the Probability Dancer.
Dancer followed Jonstantine around the corner only to be smacked in the face. Sarah went down hard as Jonstantine turned back into the Spaced Fandom and they disappeared.
“What happened to the Gulp N' Go?” Sonic Boom, Speeder Super Hero and frequent customer asked as he zoomed onto the scene. "I need my Beer!"

Crisis on Infinite Parodyverses Part #6 This Is How The World Goes Away

The Cowled Criminal’s Citadel, within the deep encompassing blackness, where the creator of this fortress stands watching over the genderless thought being called Yo. He/she is strapped to a strange machine.
The crimson mantled villain allows himself a smile.
“Master…er…er! I have the one called Dancer!” The Spaced Fandom leered as he held the Anti-Probability chains that shackled Dancer. She stared at the Cowled Criminal with an icy cold look.
“So you’re the one responsible for all those deaths!” she then saw her team mate and friend Yo in the strange machine. “YO! What have you done to her?”
“That, dear Sarah, is one of the most ingenious parts of my plan.”
“Sarah? You must have me confused with…”
“Don’t bother with the double talk Sarah Shepardson! I see all that was, is and will be! I know you Probability Dancer. I know you and I know Yo. The thought being is whatever she/he THINKS. Now THAT’S power! Yo is plugged in to my main power supply. She/he is fueling my natural retcon powers, allowing me to control the Anti-Story. You see I can’t conquer Yo-Planet or the Happy Place so I will simply have Yo here destroy them along with the rest of the Multiverse!”
“Yo won’t let you use her that way. She would never agree to that!”
“But dear Sarah she already has! See for yourself.”
A view screen opens up from the total black showing the Happy Place. Yo is there next to the Happy Place guardian Yi. Yi was holding and petting Muffins the bunny. Other rabbits were hoping around his/her feet.
“What is to be being wrong friend Yi?”
“Friend Yo! You must be to be going to Yo-Planet! Uncute Yerk is there! He to be destroying entire Tierra, Agua, Lago, Mar, Arbol and others who make up Yo-Planet!”
“Yo be going quick then!”
Dancer watched in horror as Yo was suddenly on Yo-Planet. She saw the evil Yerk glowing with power as several Yo-beings hung in energy cocoons. They all appeared to be in pain.
“Uncute fiend! You be to be leaving Yo-Beings alone!”
“HAHAHA! Yo! My set is almost complete! As you can see all your Yo-friends are here enjoying my presents. I’ve given them the one thing they never had before. PAIN!”
Nosotros, the leader in a non-political way, spoke up through the pain, “Yo go away! You cant be to be saving us! To be saving your self!”
They were all there; Nosotros, Ella, Tu, La, El, Vosotros, Ellos and many others. All in a great deal of pain. Even worse was the presence of Tierra, Agua, Lago, Mar, Arbol and others who make up Yo-Planet.
“No! If you to be keep doing this Yo-Planet will be no more!”
“That’s the idea! Oh and Yo, there’s one other thought being I wanted you to see.” Yerk held up the dead body of Rabito. “What are you to be doing about that smiley face?”
“NOOOOOO!” Yo poured out power towards her/his enemy but Yerk just smiled.
“Try harder Yo! I’m not feeling anything!”
Yo did but no matter how much power the thought being used it just made Yerk happier.
“STOP IT! You’ll kill her/him at that level of power!” Dancer pleaded.
“True. But my machine takes though power and harnesses it as raw energy to both control the Anti-Story and to fill me with power! Yo might die in the process but so what? The Anti-Story will use that pathetic creatures life energy to destroy both Yo-Planet AND the Happy Place. I cant wait to see Visionary’s face the next time he goes to the Happy Place to hide! Before long he would wind up in the middle of the Anti-Story and fade away like so many other lost concepts!”
“The heroes will stop you!”
The Cowled Criminal shrugs it off with a casual wave of his hand, “Take her to the cell. She bores me.”
As the Spaced Fandom shuffles off with Dancer a figure steps into the light.
“Is there something you wanted Retcon Raider?”
The villain looked nervous, “Yes. I was wondering when I could get a world to play with like Chronic will have?”
“In time mortal now do not press me. I have more plans to bring forth.”

The combined trouble of messed up dimensions and time lines, crazy weather and strange astronomical oddities build up through out the Multiverse. The effects of the Crisis is now seen far and wide.

In the Mythlands Exile uses his energy to protect Valeria of Carfax and her people from time displaced Nazis. The currently time displaced hero called Avatar uses his Avasword to help out.

Behind enemy lines in East Germany in the year 1955 AD the AutisticAtomicSci-FiSpy! Stands ready to deal with this new threat. He doesn’t know the HairyHoneyBerserkerBarbarian! But he’s sure he can subdue him, at least he thinks he can.

In the year 2460 AD, deep in space, the United Systems Starship, Enterpies NOT1601-D travels on it’s present course. Aboard the bridge Captain Jay Luc Pickacard, Commander Bryker, Counselor Shepoi; Chief Engineer Lieutenant La Falc, Doctor Beverly Chysher, her son Ensign spifley Chysher, the Fake Man Lieutenant Commander Visa and the first Chronlong in Space Fleet, Lieutenant Exorf all stare in shock as young Tom Stevens and "Huckleberry" Harris gasp in shock back at them.
“Hey Huck! This sure ain’t the Mississippi!” Tom said as he pointed to the view screen showing a view of the stars that these two country boys never could see in the mid-1800’s where they were from.

The secret headquarters of the Improbable College in the year 1720 ad, where ManMan holds up Knifie for safety. “Where am I? Who are you people?”
Rev Dr Septimo Alarcon spoke softly, “It’s alright sir. We won’t hurt you.”
Florento de Clement, Sarah of Dunboggie, Buckland Dean, Dr. Gulliver Wilton and Leonardo de Lapidus look on with wonder at the strangely garbed man and the talking knife.
“Wait a minute… I know you people!” Knifie stated.

From his hexagonal ship the Lurker sees all this.
“Every passing moment it gets worse. I can only hope I have enough time.”
He looks at several images before him. One is of the heroine Spandex Lass. The next of the shape shifter Wiblk. The third picture was of Contessa Imke Ilse Zemo (Zemette). The forth of the Man Who Wasn't There. The last picture was of the Scourge of the BZL. Baron Heinrich Zemo, Dr Vishnar, the Late Great Donald Blake, Wonderbooster, Substitute Grim Reaper, Jam, Pegasus and Uatu the renegade Observer were all posed for that picture.
“Most of these have been retconed or I might have used some of them. I’ll have to trust the agents I’ve already chosen to do the job.”

The town is called Old Gulp Gulch and the year is 1861 AD. It’s the heart of the Old West, when law men defended the innocent settlers from the crooked, rotten scum that preyed upon them.
“HEY! I’m not a crooked, rotten scum!” Daniel Irving, nicknamed Bad Lash, protested as he landed on his butt after being literally thrown out of the saloon.
Sheriff Wild Eliza Cyote gave a rotten sneer and replied, “You were cheetin’ in cards Bad Lash! I don’ take a cotton t’ cheats in this here town. An besides, I don’ like th’ way yo’ wuz lookin’ at young Miss Pessydew. Now get!”
“Aw I was just havin’ some harmless fun sheriff. Hey! Put that six shooter down! I’m getting’, I’m getting’!”
Bad Lash picked up a flower, sniffed it and placed it on his vest. He waved and gave a goofy grin then hopped on his horse. Within minutes he was out of the town and trotting out in the near by desert.
He thinks to himself, “Daniel you did it again. One of these days I’m gonna have to play honest. Ah well, I didn’t come here for women and cards anyway. I came out here because Key-Whoa-No-Pay or Bastion Bear, whatever he’s calling himself now, telegraphed me an’ told me something was weird out here.”
He comes up a hill and looks down to see an impossible sight. Phased into an old gold mine is an incredible tall golden tower. Readers would recognize it as one of the Lurker’s Vibrational Sporks.
“And from the look of that thing I guess that must be it!”
Bad Lash swung off his horse and tied it to a post. Near by he spied several horses signifying other travelers must be inside. “Well! I recon I ain’t the only one Key-Whoa-No-Pay invited. Well, I’d better go it nice and quiet just in case it’s some one else.”
As Bad Lash carefully moved to where he could see the large opening of the cave a familiar Native American voice spoke out from the figures gathered there.
“There is no point trying to sneak Bad Lash.”
“Heh. I should’ve known you’d hear me with your acute senses Scalpchopper!”
“They could hear you a mile away.” Key-Whoa-No-Pay, the half Indian half white man known as the Scalpchopper replied to his long time friend. “You should know some of those I’ve assembled here.”
Bad Lash looked around the darkened cave. The strange machine that was fused with the cave gave off a certain glow, allowing him to see who was there.
Key-Whoa-No-Pay introduced each one,
“Jonah Burch.”
The Civil War vet turned bounty hunter with the scared face nodded and replied to his old friend, “Lash.”
“The LocoQuick-DrawSarsaparillaOutlaw!” Key-Whoa-No-Pay somehow said with no excitement.
The woman in bright western wear smiled, “Hey there!”
“Thunder Reed.”
“Nice to meet you. I’ve heard a lot about you partner.” Reed said.
“The Trigger Twin Boys.”
Rick and Bryan Forman nodded.
“Cinnamon Shepherdson.”
“Hey Bad Lash. Been awhile.” The red headed cowgirl replied.
“My old friend Boom Boom Wick.”
The Native American sheriff of another town nodded.
“And finally the Butler Kid and Night Falcon.”
The sharply dressed Butler Kid nodded while the black garbed and masked Night Falcon spoke up, “Scalpchopper and I found the machine. We figured we could use some help.”
Key-Whoa-No-Pay continued for him, “Yes. It’s very strange. No birds fly near it. We could see strange shadows moving across it.”
“Ah still don’ see why you didn’t call th’ army?” Burch asked.
“I just felt like I needed to summon all of you. I can’t explain it.”
“There’s a lotta stuff like that goin’ on.” Trickshot, the aggravating archer replied as he and the Earth Ranchburger hero known as Dream Catcher stepped out from the shadows.
“Spooks!” Bad Lash said as he pulled his gun.
“Whoa John Wayne! We’re not ghosts! We’re from the future an’ we’re here to help!”
Burch spoke up, “I ran across a time traveler before. It ain’t impossible.”
“I say lets give them a chance. Couldn’t hurt.” Thunder Reed offered. He was one of the first heroes of the untamed West so people tended to listen to him.
“Heh. I always thought I’d fit in back in the Old West.” Tricky commented as the heroes started to shake hands.
Scalpchopper just eyed Dream Catcher carefully. He could not understand what tribe would send out their braves dressed in bright red and blue skins.
Dream Catcher ignored the Native American hero’s strange looks and spoke to Trickshot, “I just want to get this mission over with so I can get back to my Earth.”
“You and me both brother.” Tricky replied. He had just discovered that his home Earth was never destroyed like the Hooded Hood had misled him to believe and all he could think of was getting back there.
“Whut in tarnation?” the Two-Gun Hat said as he pointed. Strange shadow demons were coming out of the machine. They started for the heroes.
The cave was filled with the noise of rapid gun fire as bullets passed right through the creatures.
“There’s your spooks Lash!” Cinnamon Shepherdson said while firing her gun.
Joseph Redstone (aka Dream Catcher) was born with the ability go into people's dreams and also cast the illusion that the Dream came true. In this situation, with various dark Shadow Creatures attacking Trickshot, the Old Western heroes and himself, that power really wouldn’t help much.
“Can these creatures dream?” he wondered. Regardless he tried focusing on the Shadow Creatures mind. “I can’t get in!”
“What?” Trickshot asked as he fired an electric arrow, which destroyed one of the creatures.
“It’s mind! It doesn’t have one! These things aren’t thinking, breathing individuals like us! It’s like they all have the same mind, no the same dark force.”
“Well I don’t care if they were all controlled by Epitome in a thong! Just help us get ‘em!” Tricky fired two explosive arrows and the mine shook a bit.
Everyone looked around nervously then went back to firing on the creatures.
“I don’t know what to do! I throw dynamite at varmints! I cant do that in a mine!” the Native American sheriff known as Boom Boom Wick explained in a panic as he crouched behind the Trigger Twin Boys. Rick and Bryan Forman kept shooting through the demons.
“You’re not the only one who feels useless Wick! My brother and I aren’t doing any better!”
“Bryan is right! These things aren’t slowing…ARRRGGH!”
It was a horrible sight as the Shadow Creatures passed through Boom Boom Wick and the Trigger Twin Boys. All three screamed as they died. Their bodies turned plaid and they simply faded away forever.
Jesse O’Hare, the LocoQuick-DrawSarsaparillaOutlaw!, just stopped firing at the creatures and said, “They’re gone! They just disappeared!”
The crack of a black whip and Jesse is pulled away from the advancing creatures. She looks to her hero, dressed all in black.
“Good evening sinor. You’d better watch your self.” El Devil said to the female gunfighter. No one here knew Jesse was posing as a man but in fact was secretly a woman.
“We need to get out of this here mine before it comes down on top o’ us!” Thunder Reed explained.
“Yeah. Anyone got ideas? Those things are blocking th’ only exit!” Jonah Burch said.
Suddenly the gunfighters, and assorted Western heroes were shocked to see more strange figures appear in the cave.
Only Trickshot could recognize the scene before him. “What? NO! What’s going on?”
There, before the annoying archer, laid the dead bodies of the many heroes he’s fought beside while living in the Parodyverse; Amazing Guy, Exile, Dancer, Fin Fang Foom, Goldeneyed, Lisa, Yo, Visionary, Nats, Jack Rabbit, Phantom Ghost Girl, Donar, NTU-150, Swift, ManMan, Sir Mumphrey Wilton, CrazySugarFreakBoy, Hatman, Ziles, Sorceress, the Golden Age Pigeonman and Pigeonwoman, Desert Rose, Lisette and worse of all Natalia Romanza, his true love.
“How… what…?”
The dead heroes started to rise, shocking all but one hero even more. Natalia spoke up, pointing a finger to Trickshot, “You could have saved us Carl! We died because you were too slow!”
“But… this is my dream! You cant be here! I tried Natalia! I really tried!”
Joseph Redstone spoke up, “Trickshot! Ignore them! They’re not real! One of my powers is that I can go into others dreams and nightmares and make them a reality! I can even do it while the subject is awake. I choose your nightmare because I thought they could help!!” Dream Catcher turned to his dream creations and commanded, “GO DEAD HEROES! FIGHT THOSE CREATURES!”
Amazingly they did. Soon several zombie heroes were attacking the Shadow Creatures with all sorts of powers. The battle started to spill outside of the cave as the phantom heroes pushed the shadow monsters back.
“That is an incredible gift the spirits have given you.” Scalpchopper said to Dream Catcher.
“Yes but it’s still not enough! If only Trickshot was asleep, my creations could easily defeat most of those creatures. With him awake they might only be able to defeat less then half.”
“I don’t know much about that.” Bad Lash replied while watching the fantastic scene, “All I know is help is appreciated however it comes!”
As the heroes watch no one sees a stray shadow creature circle in behind Trickshot. The amazing archer is focusing his mind on the creatures, trying to ignore his very nightmare parading around for all these strangers to see. He lets out a barrage of arrows, unaware of the creature about to grab him from behind.
“Look out behind ya, future man!” Jonah Burch yelled as he tackled Tricky to the hard ground. The creature flew over, barely missing Tricky.
Carl Bastion, the loud mouth known as Trickshot is speechless.
Jesse O’Hare moves closer to Tricky and asks, “Hey pardner. After this is all over can we talk about that future you come from? I wanna know some things about women and whut they c’n do in the future.”
That’s just as well as the Vibrational Spork starts to hum.
“It’s a cave in!” The Butler Kid yelled as he charged for the exit. Night Falcon followed him outside.
When they got there they could see Dream Catcher’s phantoms vanishing. Behind that they saw an endless horizon of Plaid.
“What is that?” Night Falcon shouted as he hopped on his horse. He felt strangely drawn to it.
He took off with his horse at full gallop. The Butler Kid jumped on his steed, Melissa, and took off after him.
“HEY! NIGHT FALCON! What are you doing?”
“It’s everywhere Kid! It stretches North an’ South, an look! The town is vanishing inside it!”
They were getting too close to the endless Plaid Wall for the Butler Kid’s comfort. He watched in horror as the remains of Old Gulp Gulch vanished. Sheriff Wild Eliza Cyote could be seen silently screaming as the wall dissolved him.
Lighting flashed, upturning Night Falcon’s jet black horse. The Western hero fell to the hard ground inches away from the horrible Wall. He fired his gun but the bullets dissolved on the surface.
“NIGHT FALCON! GET AWAY FROM THERE!” The Butler Kid jumped off his horse and ran to his friend but by the time he got there it was too late. Night Falcon was fading away. The Butler Kid just stared in shock. Within minutes he too vanished forever.

The Plaid Wall is here in the year 3205 AD as well. The giant spires and spread out skyways slowly dissolve to the multicolored death.
As the buildings vanish we see Frozen Produce, Amazingly Cosmic Boy, Lightning-Hatress, Exferno and WildYofire fire their various blasts into the wall with no affect.
Amazingly Cosmic Boy turns to speak in his flight ring as team mates Bouncing thud and Triple L hover behind him. “Jan how is the evacuation going on your end? Nothing we do seems to work.”
Golden Elemental aka Jan Arrah responded into his ring while changing the molecules of a broken window into something to carry several hurt refugees from a collapsed building. Pegistar was above him carrying two more people as her large white wings flapped. De X Streak can be seen zooming by with a child in her arms. “The evacuation is going well. There’s just so much to do and no time to do it!”
WolfWolf is helping a woman get up while Big-Bird holds up another building. Heroic Von-el and Phantom Ghost Girl can be seen in the background flying more people to safety.
Golden Elemental put the frightened people down and spoke into in ring communicator again, “Vishy, any idea what’s causing this?”
Lair Legion of Super Heroes HQ, where Visionary 5, Dream Chyrel and Natstar watch the chaos from the communication room.
“I told you not to call me that!” Vish 5 responds with frustration.
Dream Chyrel just stares at the screens in shock, “I don’t understand it! I dreamt it would come, but I haven’t dreamt of how we’ll stop it! I always see the solution in my dreams!”
“Jan we don’t have any answers yet. Kyle, how is the British evacuation going?” Vish 5 turned to speak with the other Legionaries helping out in England.
The Invisible Archer also known as Kyle Norm speaks into his ring while Matter Eating Musician stands next to him, “Tenzon and I just finished evacuating Buckingham Palace. The others are just arriving from the South side of town.”
As Frog Boy, Karate Knight and Princess ProjectrAsil glide with the power of their flight rings they each spot a disaster waiting to happen. Their two team mates stand in front of a crumbling wall. Behind the wall is the Plaid Wall of Entropy.
“KYLE! TENZON! WATCH OUT!” Karate Knight called out but to no avail. The wall moved faster then anyone expected, enveloping both Invisible Archer and the Matter Eating Musician.
Back at the LLSH HQ, in the Hall of the Fallen, where statues of the dead Legionaries Chemical Hwk and Mailbox look down, two Legionaries stand silently.
“Oh! No!” White Sorceress gasped.
“What is it Mysa?” the gravely voice of oBlok asked.
“We just lost two more. When will it end?”

The futuristic cityscape of the 31st Century gives way to the extraordinary pyramids of 1390 BC.
A gleaming Vibrational Spork stands among the geometric monolithic buildings. Already there is action amidst the Spork as Shadow Demons fly through the air burning slaves and citizens alike. The Lurker’s machine has just started a strange humming noise which has caused the creatures to act more erratic.
Two more of the Lurker’s chosen try their best at fighting them off.
Glory, the Mutt of Might, zooms through the air, trying to lead the creatures away from the people and the Spork. She barks to her heroic companion using a system of signals to speak. “I’m worried these dark things will win. I wish my friends in the Legion were here!”
King Lui, the talking super intelligent ape leader of the Vesaliains, responded in English to the dog, “Well they are not but we’ll have to manage on our own.” It was an easy matter for Lui to master Glory’s language. He was using his strength to throw large bricks at the creatures. They were having no effect. “If I had known what I would have been facing I would have brought the proper weapons from my home!”
Glory flew up the to the ape king and hovered a moment in the air. She looked out at the destructive Plaid Wall of Entropy as it devoured the desert ground. “There MUST be something we can do!”
The Egyptians watched the powerful pooch and the talking ape with awe. Here at the End of the World the Gods have finally come to walk (and fly!) among men! Word quickly spread through the valley that the Gods have come to usher their souls to the afterlife.
“Another thing I am uncomfortable with is how they look at us! They think we are deities!” Glory barked.
“I have grown accustomed to this as my people’s king, but yes, it is wrong for these particular people to worship us.”
“If you are not Gods then what are you? Answer now or face the full wraith of the World Guardians!” a voice warned.

[Crisis Pin-Up Poster #6: The World Guardians:
Pigeon Warrior, the owner of the warning, flaps his mighty wings in mid air. One arm pointing and the other holding his mace. His wife Pigeonette flaps on his right side as she aims her spear. Directly under Pigeon Warrior is Dagda the Good. He stands in his druid robes holding Knifie majestically. On his right is the Mighty Lisis in her fighting stance and on his left is the lethal Cobra curled up ready to strike. On the left of Cobra is the bouncing PyramidProdigyAcolyteArchitect! He’s smiling at the newcomers. On the right of Lisis is the ancient wise man Homer Vugo. He’s leaning on his staff. Hovering amongst several golden magical symbols above Pigeon Warrior is the supreme wizard Muff Tu Ta.]

The Winged Warrior lands beside King Lui and Glory awaiting a response.
“You must be the heroes of this era. I am King Lui of the Vesaliains and this is Glory, the Mutt of Might. We’re from the future and it is our mission to protect this machine from those creatures. Will you help us?”
“They are speaking the truth. They are not the cause of the disasters that plague us.” Homer Vugo announced.
“Fine. Then lets not waste any more time. Cobra, Lisis and Dagda help evacuate the people…”
“I will NOT work that closely with any fool who serves Nekhebet!” Cobra hissed.
“And I will not work with a Buto follower!” Lisis snapped back like a hungry vulture.
“Enough! We don’t have time for your constant squabbles! Pigeonette will go with Cobra and Dagda to help the people escape that terrible Wall. Lisis, PPAA and I will help these two strangers stop those shadow demons. Muff Tu Ta and Homer Vugo if you two would be so kind as to find a solution to this madness it would be excellent! Let’s go!”
“Well once again we leap head first into the breach. Any chance I could avoid shattering those shadow demons again Dagda? It doesn’t feel very good.” Knifie pointed out.
Before his wielder could respond Ptahmose Amenhotep, the PyramidProdigyAcolyteArchitect!, says to King Lui, “So you animals are from the future? Any chance we could talk later after this is all over? I want to learn about future architecture!”

The exiled priest Kuu Kuu Ka Chu watched these events from his secret temple. As the deadly Jackal-Cat practices his fighting skills in the background, Ka Chu mused that for all their heroism, it might not be enough.

1879 ad, Victorian Paradopolis, where the glowing, humming Vibrational Spork stands erect in the middle of Off Centre Park.
“LANCE! NO!” young Hopkins called out as Harry "Stoneface" Drury pulled the young lad away from the oncoming Anti-Story Wall that was vaporizing one of his team mates. Drury managed to get the shocked Hopkins to a safer spot where US Treasury Agent Franklin Bookman and Dr Hakenfakir watched on in fear.
“Did you see that?” Hopkins said to the others, “Lance Runner just vanished in that thing! It killed him!”
“I suspect it would do the same to us if we do not move further south.” Dr Hakenfakir replied as he fingered his Psychostave.

Elsewhere, at the base of the Vibrational Spork, two out of time heroines and five members of the distinguished League of Improbable Gentlemen are in the middle of a battle with various Shadow Demons.
Fashion Fairy flies past young Sir Mumphrey Wilton’s ear, “My magical zaps and Miss Burner’s fire powers seem to be slowing the creatures down but not by much!”
The striking young witch known as Hagatha Darkness replied as she gestured magical spells, engulfing the Shadow Demons, “It will have to be enough myth creature!”
“By Jove you’re right Miss Darkness! We’ll give them a righteous pounding, what?” Sir Mumphrey responded.
US Secret Service Agent Tom Stevens continued to fire his guns through the demons, “I shore wish I could do more an’ shoot ‘em!”
“We all do what comes naturally and try our hardest to stay alive boy!” Colonel Blanchford Bertram answered as he stabbed a shadow creature with Knifie. The dark attacker shattered.
“That sure felt familiar.” Knifie noted quietly to Bertram.
“So you’re really from the future? 1942 you say? Simply wondrous! After this is all done do you think we could talk? There are so many things about future inventions I want to learn!” Phineas Quimby, the EccentricEtherInvestigatorExplorer! asked the misplaced in time member of the All Star Winners Squadron as he used one of his inventions to blast apart a shadow demon.
Miss Burner answered as she used her fire generating powers to blast other shadow demons apart, “Uh I’m afraid not. I’ve met a time traveler before by the name of Justin and he told me we should never discuss…”
“You know Justin Tyme?” Quimby asked with excitement.

While on Parody Isle, where the mysterious Hastings Vernal watches the Plaid Wall slowly advance, fellow LOIG member Lyle Clancy wonders aloud, “We’ll get out of this one right Vernal?”
The enigmatic man with the initials HV has no reply.

The present day, in what is called the Great Relief or Atticland, the reclusive Abhumans try to save their city from crumbling as the Anti-Story nears their hideaway in the Tibetan mountains.
The city rumbles and pieces of the towering buildings fall to the ground. We see Krakus and Garglon leading a group of Abhuman citizens to safety.
Toadton the amphibiabhuman leaps out of scolding water to fall helplessly onto dry land. The temperature in the underground waterway has risen so high that this particular Abhuman will need the Healing Halls to recover.
Sylverkrin, of the tangled hair, queen of the Abhumans thinks of her youngest sister Uhunalura and wonders if exile was too cruel. She helps Abhuman children into the shelter all the while missing her sibling. She glances at Suresnout, the pig-monster-teleporting-thing as the creature carries children to safety and wishes she could fetch her sister.
And what about King Brown Blot? As he watches his city crumble he turns to the view screen that shows an image of his mad brother Maximess the Manic still a prisoner. He wonders if Maximess isn’t the responsible party then what is destroying his kingdom and what could he possibly do about it?

The Shattered Worlds, existing just off the usual alternate Earth course. It has had more then it’s fair share of trouble. Each of these worlds spawned a being who could have brought their evil to other universes. The Triumvirate worked on each Earth, exiling them to a strange co-habitat pocket universe.
If not for the Lurker’s intervention another Earth, the Earth that the Lair Legionnaire Trickshot came from, would’ve been destroyed in the Anti-Story wave. Now is sits with the remaining Shattered Worlds, being slowing dissolved.
The Plaid Wall has already claimed three of the six Shattered Worlds. Among the ones destroyed was the Earth once belonging to the dead villain called the Soloist.

Captain Marbles flies high over this Earth’s Paradopolis, watching the destruction. He’s deep in thought. “So the sole reason I was brought through time before my death to the present year was to distract some enemy from capturing this era’s Protector of the Parodyverse? I still cant wrap my head around it. One moment I’m serving my cosmic boss, Eggo the Living Waffle. I’m on my way to fight Dark Thugos. The next minute I’m years in the future and I find out not only did I die in that battle but there is a new Protector of the Universe. So I find my way to Earth and get caught up helping the heroes there until I get caught up in this Crisis. Now I’m on an alternate Earth helping more heroes escape death. Why couldn’t things just slow down a bit? I could use all this knowledge of the future to prevent my death.”
Hatman’s voice breaks his concentration. “Cap come in! We need you down by Off Centre Park pronto!”
“Captain Marbles here! I’m on my way!” The former Protector of the Universe zooms back towards the park in a trail of stars.

The remaining members of the Lair Legion of Earth Tricky stood assembled. They were tired, worn and desperate. The membership includes; Hatman (whom has had a tough life rising to leadership after the original members were slaughtered long ago), Nats, the widowed Dancer (who just lost her husband ManMan to this Crisis), Wangmundo, Amazing Guy (Tom Irving) and their newest recruit, the Earth Tricky version of Michael Wooster.
Besides the Lair Legion there stands Bizarro Epitome (a mirror reflection of the Parodyverse hero), Joshua the ape and one hundred genetically engineered ape soldiers.
Access, one of the Lurker’s assistants, stands there too. He’s been assigned to help these Earths but so far he hasn’t been able to do much. His ability to open portals to other universes has been cutting out ever since he arrived here with Captain Marbles.
As the hero arrived he saw what the urgency was. All three members of the Triumvirate were standing there in the center of the park.
Bizarro Epitome was speaking to them, “The survivors of the seven million strong ape army are scattered across the other worlds, trying to get people to safety. So many have been lost to that nightmare. Joshua here has taxed his probability powers to their limits.”
“Well you won’t have to work so hard anymore.” Jury, the Shaper of Worlds, said in her soft voice, “We’ve come to take the remaining Shattered Worlds away.”
“Well THAT’S good news!” Dancer replied with relief.
“You misunderstand the Shaper.” The Chronicler said with a flat monotone voice, “We have come for the remaining three Shattered Worlds. They are our responsibility. We do not mean your world.”
“What? You cant leave us to die!” Hatman protested.
Dark Thugos gathered himself up and shear menace became personified. He simply explained in his gravely death filled voice, “You’re world was NOT exiled by us. We have nothing to do with it. We will remove our Shattered Worlds from the board and let the chips fall where they may for the rest.”
“Fall where they may? You’re talking about PEOPLE! You cant let us just die!” Hatman was furious and so was the rest of the heroes present.
The Chronicler responded cold as ever, “We can and we will.”
Thugos smirked at this and Captain Marbles, his old foe, saw this. He powers up his fists and starts to move towards the Destroyer of Tales. “You monster! I don’t know how you conned your way into such a high profile job but I’ve defeated you before! I’ll do it again!”
“YOU defeated ME? No. You delayed me, simple as that. By the time I was able to start my conquest of Earth you were long gone. Killing in fact. By me.”
Marbles fires at Thugos in a rage built up from the knowledge of all he will have lost.
Thugos simple smiles in his eerie, wicked way and snaps his thick fingers.
Captain Marbles vanishes.
“What did you do to him?” Tom demanded.
“Simply my job. His story was finished years ago. I simply returned him to his proper ending. He wont remember a thing of his time here. That’s one enemy finished.”
“Why you!” Tom starts to charge himself with the power cosmic. The others begin to back him up.
“ENOUGH!” The Chronicler shouts, startling everyone. “It is time.”
A flash of light and the three other worlds that filled the sky are gone. Along with them Bizarro Epitome, Joshua and the one hundred genetically engineered ape soldiers are also gone.
“The Plaid Wall is gone! They saved us after all!” Dancer called out.
“If that’s so how come the sky is red?” Nats wondered.
Access replied, “We’ve only been given a brief reprieve. The Wall will be back and this time there will be no getting away.”
“Figures. We’re toast. Just my luck. I finally get something good in life like these powers and the world falls apart.” Michael Wooster complained.
“You haven’t been with us very long Wooster. We’ll beat this. It’s what the Lair Legion does!” Hatman responded.
Tom looked at Access for confirmation but he found none.

Elsewhere, in the Sub Stratum between universes, Eggo the Living Waffle finally wakes up from his forced hibernation.
“WHAT-HAPPENED? I-WAS-PUT-INTO-HIBERNATION! I-WILL-FIND-OUT-WHO-IS-RESPONSIBLE-AND-DEAL-WITH-THEM!”
Then his cosmic senses kick in.
“WHAT? HOW-CAN-THIS-BE? THE-WORLDS-ARE-DYING! WHY-DIDN’T-THE-OMNISOUL-WAKE-ME? THIS-IS-WHAT-AMAZING-GUY-WAS-CREATED-FOR! WHERE-IS-HE?”
Eggo tuned his extremely powerful cosmic senses outward until he could find his agent.
“THAT’S-THE-ONE-WHO-IS-DESTROYING-UNIVERSES! HE-HAS-MY-CHAMPION! NOW-THE-COWLED-CRIMINAL-WILL-KNOW-MY-WRATH!”
In a fantastic display of power and Kirby dots, Eggo opens a portal to the End of Time.

To be continued!

Next up; Kerry Shepardson! Artimies! Con Jonstantine! Annabelle and Roland! The Cyclotronic Man! Ham-Boy and Jarvis visit the Satireverse! The Den Defenders! Lord Nats and the tyrannical Dr Al B. Harper! The Lair Knights! Nats and Suicide Blonde! Extraordinary Endeavor Enterprises! Eggo vs the Cowled Criminal round one! Progeny of 2020! Fleabot! Asil & Idiom! Samantha Featherstone and the New Lair Legion of 2020! The new Power Rod! The fate of Vessel! Humdinger’s betrayal! The End of the Parodyverse and Satireverse?

All as soon as I can.

Let the Footnotes Play

There are tons so let’s get them over with…

MUSINGS OF MY MUSE NOTE:
Annabelle mentioned “Dracu’s gambit” in relation to Jackie Rabbit. It should be noted that Jackie was bitten and turned into a vampire by Count Dracu. She “got better” in Tales of the Haunted Parodyverse, Part 6

Watch this space for more on this.

WONDERFUL EMAIL NOTE:
A quick thank you to Brian for help with the Wonderful 7, Dream Catcher and the folks of Goth Heaven. THANK YOU!

WEAR THE PLAID ME LAD NOTE:
It should be noted that the Cowled Criminal used the collected artifacts to summon the Plaid Wall of Anti-Story. He uses Yo to keep it in check. He also absorbs power from both the collected artifacts and Yo.

I THINK I CAN NOTE:
Here are notes straight from Pillar (poster known as Yo) on Yo’s world…
Yo cast
Yo and Yi are already there. And of course Yerk/Lola is another one, however evil.

Yo-beings-that-move:
Nosotros: leader in a non-political way, s/he is more the voice who speaks the thoughts of the planet.
Others are: Ella, Tu, La, El, Vosotros, Ellos...those are the ones named. They are whatever they think they are similar to Yo.
And I think that is all...Rabito is a Yo-being from the happy place, where it was thought by Visi with Yi helps, and s/he is the most special being because wasn't created or thought the normal way. Has the same powers than others but not the same intellect (I blame his creator )

Yo beings can merge their thoughts, being a terrible force of the nature when they do...I would bet that like the nature, they don't have to be specially good not bad when merged...so they don't do it too often... Yo-beings are basically “good”, however is not “good” what one would apply to them. They have different standards to us. There are grumpy Yo-beings, or sweet, or caring, cheeky, etc. Yo is the most complete having most of the attributes together in one being

Yo-beings-that-don’t-move:
Yo-planet (=Tierra) is the oldest being and most loved one, together with Agua, Lago, Mar, Arbol, etc, etc...these beings don't move...has lost their capacity being very old beings and form their planet...For example, "Agua" means water and can be found laying across the planet...S/he can only "think" in lakes, turbulences, etc...that is, watery things..

RETCON WHO NOTE:
The Retcon Raider is really John Byrne, comic book writer and artist. He’s fought the Lair Legion earlier on in their history. We saw him in this new identity in Access & Humdinger, Hide & Seek Part 3

I DON’T REMEMBER THEM NOTE:
With the Hooded Hood and his retcon powers about various characters have been wiped out from history and others memories.

Spandex Lass a.k.a. Princess Aphasia was an Abhuman princess who left the Great Relief (Atticland) for the outside world and became a great hero. The Hooded Hood retconed her from existence. Maybe if he had not she would have bridged the gap between mankind and her people?

Wiblk was a shape shifting alien from another planet and good friend to Amazing Guy. He ceased to exist when actions in the past caused Galactivac to eat his planet thousands of years before he was born. The real reason for this was that my best guy friend, Willard, created Wiblk as his posting character. When he decided to try to take the character into pro writing he asked that Wiblk become removed from the Parodyverse.

Contessa Imke Ilse Zemo (Zemette) was the daughter of Baron Zemo. A great villain who came about from the Sidekick saga in Untold Tales of the Lair Legion, She was last seen at the mercy of the Hero Feeders.

The Man Who Wasn't There hung around the Scourge of the BZL for awhile, then the League of Regulars/Lair Legion, then clashed with his evil counterpart in the Anti-League, the Man Who Was Always There. As far as I’ve heard they mutually destructed. TMWWT then became the Shaper of Worlds (not to be confused with the current Shaper, Jury). TMWWT came back though, and he fell out (in continuity) with Jarvis after some kind of fraud scam. Thereafter TMWWT rejoined Zemo's Scourge. The relationship between TMWWT and that particular Shaper akin to that of the Dark Knight and the Chronicler of Stories.
Eventually that Shaper just vanished, and Jury was appointed as new Shaper. TMWWT was amongst the characters at Zemo's castle when the Hooded Hood retconned Zemo and most of his works to not exist from that point onwards (but their previous timeline remains untouched).
Posters Andy Dean and JJJ (I think) both have written about a new TMWWT but we’ve yet to see more of him.
(TMWWT paraphrased from Ian Watson. THANKS IAN!)

The Scourge of the BZL (Baron Heinrich Zemo, Dr Vishnar, the Late Great Donald Blake, Wonderbooster, Substitute Grim Reaper, Jam, Pegasus and Uatu the renegade Observer) were villains that constantly plagued the LL and the Hooded Hood in the early days of the board. The Hooded Hood had the last laugh as he retconned all but Dr Vishnar and Pegasus out of existence. What the new Zemo in town, grandniece Baroness Elizabeth Sweetwater Dewdrop Zemo, will do about the retcon has yet to be seen.

LET’S TAKE A TRIP TO THE MEDITERRANEAN NOTE:
Here are some excerpts from the era of the World Guardians to give you an idea of that period of history…

* Circa 1395 BC: During the last days of Pharaoh Rummy Tumm Tumm several events took place. The ancient Egyptian wizard, Muff Tu Ta, placed the cosmic significance known as the Omnisoul into the Helmet of Omni. He placed it on his head and became Ta-Ta and served the Pharaoh as his champion. Ca Hutow, an Egyptian scientist found a metal at that time from a meteorite and he called it Flynowha. He used it to become Pigeon Warrior. Then his wife became Pigeonette.

* Circa 1394 BC: Ptahmose Amenhotep is in his early teens, when he became the PyramidProdigyAcolyteArchitect! Ptahmose Amenhotep was an architect and a priest from a time when the two disciplines were linked. PPAA! was an idea guy, always thinking, albeit a little bit ahead of even himself at times, since he occasionally got flashes of building innovations that not even he fully understands how to make real. He was an acolyte, a priest in training, which means he serves what he believes to be spiritual forces, as well as the new pharaoh, whom he would also see as a god. Ptahmose looked up to Ca Hutow. They were friends and worked together against such villains as the Jackal-Cat.

* Pigeon Warrior, Lisis, PyramidProdigyAcolyteArchitect! and Ta-Ta all became the Egyptian Quartet. They battled such foes as Kuu Kuu Ka Chu, Jackal-Cat and Vergil Salvage.

* Dagda the Good (good not because of his moral disposition but because of the diversity of his skills) He possesses a magical club that can heal the dead or slay the living, and also possesses a cauldron that can feed unlimited numbers of people. He happens upon Knifie, the Sentient Blade and starts adventures among the early druids.

* Circa 1393 BC: Homer Vugo is a great leader among men at this time. He was a traveler and searched the Old World for heroes. When he traveled to Egypt he met the Egyptian Quartet and convinced them to join him and form the World Guardians. They beat the evil warmonger Vergil Salvage. Pegasus, Dagda the Good & Knifie join their number.

DOING THE DRUID NOTE:
Here are some notes straight from Lee Callaway (the creator of Knifie and his side kick ManMan) about Dagda the Good, Knifie’s wielder at the time of Ancient Egypt:
“I would go with and English Druid. Maybe he's a bit of a spellcaster, maybe
Knifey's his familiar? I did a little digging on the 'net and found this
nice little site if you wanted more information about them, they sound like
perfect Hero material, actually. : )

www.religioustolerance.org/druid.htm

If I had to pick a name, I'd go with... Dagda the Good. As explained
below...

"Dagda the Good (good not because of his moral disposition but because of
the diversity of his skills) He possesses a magical club that can heal the
dead or slay the living, and also possesses a cauldron that can feed
unlimited numbers of people."

CHAOTIC AGENT OF EGYPT NOTE:
PyramidProdigyAcolyteArchitect! (Ptahmose Amenhotep) is the chaotic champion of Ancient Egypt.
Here is part of a conversation between Kirk (creator of the PyramidProdigyAcolyteArchitect!) and Ian (Go to man on so many great subjects)

Kirk: Which is to say, Ptahmose Amenhotep is an architect
and a priest from a time when the two disciplines were
kind of considered to be linked, probably because
creation itself was still seen as a rather divine act
at that time in human history, so those who could make
things were at least somewhat venerated for that
ability.

Ian: There's good evidence that the Egyptian priests of that time were skilled astronomers, mathematicians, and archtects. Some of the modern Masonic lodges still claim descent from these Egyptian priests (they're kidding themselves, but it's a great story).

Kirk: Of course, the fact that the pyramids themselves were
basically considered conveyances of safe passage for
the kings to the underworld no doubt has a lot to do
with it, too.

Ian: In the PV it would be cool if the pyramids actually WORKED as doorways to they Mythlands.

Maybe there will be more on this. Who knows?

SNAKE IN THE GRASS NOTE:
About Lisis and Cobra we should look at this rephrased Ian quote from the History…

* The ancient Nile Valley was divided into Upper and Lower Kingdoms (Southern and Northern Egypt respectively), each of which was protected by a patron goddess, Nekhebet the Vulture Goddess who wore the White Crown of the South, and Buto the Cobra Goddess who wore the red Crown of the North (or the Delta). They were collectively called the Nebti - the two mistresses.
Buto's main claim to fame is that when the pregnant goddess Isis was fleeing to save her unborn baby Horus from Set, Buto took care of the infant, getting mother and unborn babe to refuge on the floating island of Chemmis, where Horus was born and trained by Buto. This led to an unusual association of orphans or threatened children and cobras, and an old Egyptian wives' tale that a cobra would never attack an orphaned child, and might even care for it. Another Egyptian cultural feature was the use of cobras as a means of execution. Priestesses of Buto had a special interest in helping and training orphaned children in trouble. They expected such a child to play a Horus-like role in combating evil, and to perform the cobra's sacred function of executing criminals. Thus was born the Sect of Buto and the continuing order of assassins called Cobra. Their mission is about justice, discipline and revenge.

* While the Sect of Buto was active there was another Sect with different goals. The Sect of Nekhebet’s mission is about passion, experience, rites of passage, and defending the cycle of fate. The Nekhebet cult totem is the vulture, symbol of the cycle of life. Her accoutrements were a fly-whisk and a seal to the kingdom of Egypt, and she wore the white crown of Upper (southern) Egypt. Like Buto she is a protector of childbirth, but with more emphasis on the breeding rather than the rearing, (there may be links with the Order of the Observing Eye) although she did suckle royal children who would be pharaohs. The cult was based at Nekhab, the Greek Eileithyiaspolis, modern El Kab, the first capital of the Southern Kingdom. The first champion for the Sect of Nekhebet was Lisis.

SHATTERED EARTHS NOTE (YET AGAIN):
The Shattered Worlds
Three Earths (was six) exiled from the mainstream alternate Earths due to major Earth ruining crimes caused by certain Lair Legionaries. The Triumvirate exiled them, quarantining them from other Earths and barring anyone’s escape from them. The Omni Competent (another version of Mr. Epitome) and the Soloist (another version of Dancer) were both from here. The Soloist is dead and her world now destroyed while the Omni Competent is on Parodyverse Main.
Earth Tricky, the original home of the Lair Legionnaire Trickshot and current home of Amazing Guy Tom Irving, was added to these worlds and remained with them for a short time.

Here’s a list of those known to be on these Earths.

Bizarro Epitome’s Earth:
Bizarro Epitome
Joshua, ape with Soloist’s powers
Seven million of those genetically engineered ape soldiers

Earth Tricky:
Hatman (only surviving LL member)
Amazing Guy (Tom Irving)
Nats
Dancer
Wangmundo
PsychoAcidPervGirl! (dead)
ManMan (dead)

Whew! Hopefully next ish won’t have such big footnotes (and I didn’t even post the Wild West notes).

This story is written and copyrighted (C) 2004 by Scott Bryan (also known as AG), and may not be
reprinted without permission. Annabelle, Roland, Anthony Foresight, Amazing Guy, Justin Time, Jack Rabbit, Jackie Rabbit, Desert Rose, Eli the Elemental, Kid Produce, Scott Brunsen, Tom Irving, the JBH and the Amazing Bunch all are properties of Scott Bryan and AG.

a.g.
Amazing Guy

Scott’s Site! Featuring Caption the Pic (where action figures talk!) and Amazing Tales on the Web (stories and micros of the Parodyverse!).

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